.Ho‘oponopono literally means “to make right” or “to put things in order.” Traditionally, it was practiced in families or communities, guided by a kahuna (healer or elder), to restore harmony when conflicts arose. It involves prayer, confession, repentance, and mutual forgiveness.
In modern times, especially through the work of Morrnah Simeona and later Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len, Ho‘oponopono has been adapted into a personal spiritual practice. A simple modern version involves repeating four key phrases:
I’m sorry
Please forgive me
Thank you
I love you
The idea is that by taking responsibility for our perceptions and feelings, and cleansing our inner world, we help restore balance both within ourselves and in our relationships.
Traditional Ho‘oponopono (Community/Family Healing)
Context: Practiced for centuries in Hawaiian culture, usually led by a kahuna lapa‘au (healer) or respected elder.
Purpose: To resolve conflict, restore harmony (pono) in families, and maintain right relationships with people, ancestors, and the divine.
Process (varied by family, but often included):
Opening prayer – inviting divine guidance.Statement of the problem – each person shares openly what is troubling them.
Confession & repentance – acknowledging wrongdoing, mistakes, or harm caused.
Forgiveness & release (kala) – wrongs are forgiven, resentment released.
Restoration (ho‘oponopono) – relationships are brought back into balance.
Closing prayer & feast – sealing the reconciliation with gratitude and shared food.
Key idea: Conflict is not just between individuals but affects the whole family and even the ancestors. Healing brings everyone back into alignment.
Modern Ho‘oponopono (Personal Spiritual Practice)
Adapted by Morrnah Simeona (1913–1992), a Hawaiian healer, into a self-healing process. Later simplified and popularized by Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len.
Purpose: To cleanse inner patterns, memories, and blockages that affect one’s experience of the world. By healing inside ourselves, we shift how reality appears.
Core Practice: Repeating four phrases directed inwardly, to oneself, others, or even situations:
I’m sorry
Please forgive me
Thank you
I love you
Meaning:
I’m sorry → Acknowledging that something (in me, in memory, in consciousness) has caused disharmony.
Please forgive me → Asking release from the burden of this imbalance.
Thank you → Expressing gratitude for healing already in motion.
I love you → Affirming connection to life, self, and Spirit.
Key idea: We take 100% responsibility for what we experience. By cleansing ourselves, the external world naturally shifts.
In short:
Traditional Ho‘oponopono = communal reconciliation led by an elder, focused on relationships.
Modern Ho‘oponopono = individual spiritual practice, focused on inner cleansing and forgiveness.
1. Traditional Ho‘oponopono (Family / Group Practice)
(adapted for small groups or even two people — not a replacement for the deep ceremonial form, but a way to honor the spirit of it)
Steps:
Set the sacred space
Begin with a moment of silence or prayer, calling on Spirit, ancestors, or the Divine for guidance.
State the purpose
The leader (or whoever called the gathering) names the issue openly.
Each person affected is invited to speak honestly.
Confession & sharing
Each participant acknowledges their role, mistakes, or hurt feelings.
No blame, just responsibility.
Repentance & forgiveness (Kala – “to let go”)
Each person asks for forgiveness and offers forgiveness in return.
Example: “I’m sorry for what I said. Please forgive me.”
Others respond with acceptance: “I forgive you. I release this.”
Resolution
The group agrees on how to move forward, with restored trust and clarity.
Closing & sealing
End with prayer, gratitude, or even sharing food together — a symbolic return to harmony.
You could do this in your own family, or even privately by imagining the people present and going through the same process in meditation.
2. Modern Ho‘oponopono (Personal Practice)
(simple daily self-practice you can do silently or aloud)
Steps:
Choose a focus
A memory, feeling, relationship, or even a world event that troubles you.
Or simply begin without a specific focus, trusting what comes up.
Repeat the four phrases
Softly, slowly, as a mantra:
I’m sorry
Please forgive me
Thank you
I love you
Direct it inward first
Feel the words toward yourself: “I’m sorry for carrying this. Please forgive me for holding onto it. Thank you for healing. I love you.”
Extend it outward
Imagine the other person, the situation, or the world. Send the same phrases.
Release & trust
Let go of the need to “fix.” The practice works by cleansing unconscious patterns.
Daily rhythm
You can repeat it for a few minutes in meditation, or even use it throughout the day (in traffic, during stress, when thinking of someone).
Many people find that repeating the four phrases calms the nervous system and brings unexpected healing in relationships over time.
Together, these two forms reflect the spirit of pono — living in right relationship with self, others, nature, and Spirit.
Traditional-Style Ho‘oponopono (Group or Family Script)
(adapted for modern use — keep it simple and heartfelt)
Opening
“We come together in the spirit of aloha and with the blessing of the Divine.
We ask for guidance, clarity, and healing. May our hearts be open, and may we restore harmony among us.”
Sharing
Each person takes turns speaking:
“This is what is in my heart…”
(share feelings, hurts, or misunderstandings honestly, without blaming).
Confession & Forgiveness
After sharing, each person offers:
“I am sorry for the ways I have hurt you. Please forgive me.”The others respond:
“I forgive you. I release this. We are free.”
Resolution
“We choose to let go of resentment and restore our love and respect for each other. May peace return to our family.”
Closing
“We give thanks for this healing, for each other, and for life.
May our words and hearts be pono (in right alignment).”
(Optional: Share a meal, light a candle, or close with silence.)
Modern Ho‘oponopono (Personal Daily Script)
(use as a meditation, prayer, or quiet reflection — 5–10 minutes or longer)
Centering
Sit quietly. Place a hand on your heart. Take three slow breaths.
Invocation
“Divine Spirit, I ask for cleansing and healing of the memories, thoughts, and energies within me that cause pain or imbalance.”
Practice
Repeat slowly, to yourself or aloud:
I’m sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.Let the words be directed inward first (to yourself), then outward (to others, situations, or the world).
Closing
“I trust that healing has taken place.
Thank you. I love you. Peace.”
Ho'oponopono